Beer and God

Beer is the food of the Gods.

Ben Franklin said that beer is proof that God loves us.

Well, now please remember that although old Ben has his face on the $100 bill, that he was never president. That qualifies him as an asshole in my book.

Well, maybe not, but maybe beer is God.

You don’t know!

But know this: Beer is good. This is a fact.

Take this fact, that beer is good…as a general rule of thumb. General I say, because, some beers are terrible. But general I say, because some beers are divine.

Forget alcoholism and all that jazz. People are going to be people and some people are going to be alcoholics or drug addicts or whatever.

But know that it is an amazing thing to taste God on your lips in the form of beer! Being in the right frame of mind, with the right people, and at the right time, also helps in bringing about the divine experience. Beer is similar in this fashion to LSD. They are in fact synthesized from the same chemical!

All beers have their place in today’s society, even Natural Ice and Bud Light. Please note however, that Bud Light is an awful creation and is in no way representative of a just God. It is because it is and will always be. A certain part of the poplation consumes Bud Light. They can generally be trusted. Generally. Trusted to a degree.

Cheap beer is cheap beer. We’ve all had cheap beer and we all have our reasons and our favorites. There’s nothing wrong with cracking open a PBR or a Bud after working some shitty job all day.

In fact, know that there may be nothing better!

Know that you are human and that you are not alone.

But, know that if you have also cracked open your third eye, you will always know that you are drinking the equivalent of victory gin.

Everyone loves big brother, even the most hardened of the hard, and there may always be the slightest, if even the tiniest bit perceptible, hint of satisfaction in popping the top of a Coors Light.

However!

The food of the Gods exists and is real. Good beer is indicative of the plight of the REAL human, who bucks the norm and creates merely to create! The battle between good and evil rages on, always, in many forms and many dimensions! A line has been drawn in the ethereal sand: the caring thoughtful brewmaster fights tooth and nail against the profit-driven maga company.

Well, whatever.

This can be metaphysical or not. Lets say not.

I love beer and during my travels I will be consuming it in varying quantities. I will be opinining on the beers that I drink.

There is not a single type of beer that I dislike. I appreciate all beers. Therefore, I will not let my analysis be ruddied by my own personal beer preferences and in this way I hope to be a just and thoughtful critic. All beers can be appreciated at varying times and that one perfect beer may not be so perfect if sipped at any other time. But we all have our favorites.

The greatest beer that I ever had was a Polish honey beer called Mi0dowe. I drank this beer at a peirogie bar in Warsaw after backpacking through Eastern Europe in January with Bradrian for two weeks. It was like drinking bubbly alcoholic honey straight out of a bees asshole. Just thinking about it makes me smile and gives me a boner.

Simply divine!

There may never be(e) another beer like it.

Perhaps on a mountaintop in Patagonia?

We shall see…

Henceforth, this site shall be devoted to the consumption and review of all noteworthy beers sipped whilst traveling-ling.

Portrait of the Artist with Miodowe

Miodowe: Warsaw, PL

Miodowe: A Polish Honey Beer described by some as like, “drinking bubbly alcoholic honey straight out of a bees asshole,” this beer was had in a peirogi bar in Old Town Warsaw, PL in January of 2007. Described on its label as non-pasteurized, it appears this beer has its own facebook page under the name: Ciechan Miodowe. Check it out sometime if you dare. You can’t find this shit in the states! Or can you? Let me know if you know where one can get their grubby little paws on it. Beyond Decadence!

Lord Chesterfield Ale

Lord Chesterfield Ale: I am including the aforementioned Ale in this post if only for the description of its taste provided by Gary. Technically it was sipped while traveling as I was at a conference for mentally ill persons far away in the upstate New York hinterlands. While driving to the conference I stopped at a beer place and was intrigued by the fact that this ale was both created by Yeungling and was on-sale. The shopkeep gave this brew a thumbs up for its taste. “Not bad at all,” he said. We drank every last can of the 30-pack, although Gary noted that the taste reminded him of “apples and assholes.”

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3 responses to “Beer and God

  1. the best beer i ever drank was a red ale purchased at DEKS in good ole’ Rocky Point, long island. the frothy head was creamy and could be eaten with a spoon. ive never seen that beer anywhere else and am always on the lookout.

  2. The best beer i ever had was LSD. LSD spelled backwards is DLS few people even think of such things. They just go about everyday thinking of how much they hate their crappy boss. Boss spelled backwards is SOBB the extra B is for double bitch. you know what I’m saying? I dont. Im supposed to be dead. lehaim.

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