My tiger friend has got the sled
And I have packed a snack.
We’re all set for the trip ahead.
We’re never coming back!
We’re abandoning this life we led!
So long, Mom and Pop!
We’re sick of doing what you’ve said
And now it’s going to stop!
We’re going where it snows all year,
Where life can have real meaning.
A place where we won’t have to hear,
“Your room could stand some cleaning.”
The Yukon is the place for us!
That’s where we want to live.
Up there we’ll get to yell and cuss
And act real primitive.
We’ll never have to go to school,
Forced into submission,
By monstrous crabby teachers who’ll
Make us learn addition.
We’ll never have to clean a plate
Of veggie glops and goos.
Messily we’ll masticate
Using any fork we choose!
The timber wolves will be our friends.
We’ll stay up late and howl
At the moon till nighttime ends
Before going out on the prowl.
Oh what a life! We cannot wait,
To be in that arctic land,
Where we’ll be masters of our fate,
And lead a life that’s grand!
No more of parental rules!
We’re heading for some snow!
Good riddance to those grownup ghouls,
We’re leaving! Yukon Ho!